Sunday, November 16, 2008

I THOUGHT I TOLD YA THAT HE WON'T STOP

“Los, I just read an article on the internet that said EVANDER HOLYFIELD IS ABOUT TO FIGHT AGAIN!!!! Can you believe that?” This is the voice mail that I received earlier this week from the one and only Keebo, one of my friends from college. After listening to the message, the first thought that entered my mind was, ‘I am shocked, but not surprised. Holyfield has to be out of his mind, but that’s cool because this is going to make great blog material!’

I am one of the last boxing fans on earth. I know that we are few and far between but I still love the sweet science, even if no one else that I know does. Although I am a big boxing fan, I am a bit hypocritical because this is a sport that I would never participate in nor would allow my kids to. Boxing is a great workout, but it is ridiculously dangerous once you get into the ring. There is a lot of money to be made in boxing, ONCE YOU MAKE IT TO THE POINT WHERE YOU ARE HEADLINING PAY-PER-VIEW EVENTS. However, until you make to that point, you would have to be an idiot to be a professional boxer. Big-time fights provide up to eight-figure purses regardless of the outcome of the fight. With this type of prize money involved, one would think that every young boxer would dream of reaching the big-time, fight a couple of big fights, and gracefully bow out with the remainder of their brain capacity intact. For some reason, IT USUALLY DOESN’T WORK OUT THAT WAY! I can't explain it, but boxers seem to want to fight forever.

I have never seen a boxer who retired and stayed retired. It’s something about getting repeatedly punched in the face that keeps drawing them back to the ring. Most boxers fight past their prime, and much longer than their focus or skills should allow, i.e. Roy Jones Jr. (who is a shell of what he was in his prime at thirty-nine years old). Even at the age of forty-three, Bernard Hopkins continues to fight. He is not what he was in his prime, but he is still winning top fights and has the majority of his mental faculties. He is the exception, but definitely not the rule.
EVANDER HOLYFIELD WOULD BE THE RULE!

I must admit, that I have always been a huge Evander Holyfield fan. He is from Atlanta and has proven over the years to have the heart of two men. Now we know what happened to Lamar Odom’s heart, Holyfield has it. He has always been an undersized Heavyweight (if there is such a thing), that continually took on bigger opponents and reminded them that ATLANTA DON’T RAISE NO PUNKS!!!! Although I have always been a fan, I must admit that I realized at a very young age that this guy didn’t exactly set the curve in school.

Evander Holyfield won his first professional fight, IN 1984! That means that he has been getting punched in the face for a living for twenty-four years. Just to put that into perspective, I WAS THREE YEARS OLD WHEN HE HAD HIS FIRST PROFESSIONAL FIGHT!!!! That is not including the amateur years before he even became a professional. Needless to say, there is a good chance that he has been punched in the face more than any other living human being. What is amazing about his longevity is the fact that his style is very straight-forward and that takes just as many punches as he gives out. He isn’t exactly Floyd Mayweather Jr., who routinely goes twelve rounds without ever getting hit.

Unlike today, there was a time in recent boxing history when the heavyweight division actually meant something. It was during that time that everyone was anticipating the fight between Evander “Real Deal” Holyfield and Mike “The Cannibal” Tyson. The fight finally took place in 1996. Holyfield won the fight and became the third man in boxing history to become a three-time heavyweight champion. Surviving Tyson once wasn’t enough for Holyfield. He gave Tyson a rematch, and his ears haven’t forgiven him since. Frustrated by the superior boxing skills of Holyfield, Tyson got hungry and decided to take a bite out of Holyfield’s ear. At that moment the referee decided to stop the fight and disqualify Tyson. Holyfield, the Rhodes Scholar that he is, wouldn’t allow that. He and his doctor intervened telling the referee that he wanted to continue. I still don’t understand that decision. I am assuming that the doctor is smarter than Holyfield, so he really should not have let that genius continue to fight a man that JUST BIT HIS EAR! Nonetheless the fight continued, and Tyson continued to eat. This time he bit a chunk from Holyfield’s other ear. It obviously wasn’t seasoned to Tyson’s liking, because he immediately spit it out into the ring. That incident still didn’t deter Holyfield. Instead of retiring, he continued to fight.

The boxing powers that be finally stepped in and placed Holyfield on medical suspension from fighting. Once again, Holyfield refused to call it quits. He continued to train and was eventually reinstated. His will is admirable, yet in my opinion, amazingly foolish. Now after 53 professional fights over a span of twenty-four years, Mr. Holyfield is getting back into the ring. This time against the "Russian Giant", Nikolai Valuev. Valuev stands 7ft. tall and weighs 330lbs. Holyfield on the other hand stands a 6ft. 2-1/2in and weighs around 221 lbs. By the way, Holyfield was also in middle school (making straight A’s I’m sure) when Valuev was born. He is eleven years older than Valuev.

This fight eerily reminds me of Apollo Creed v/s Ivan Drago in Rocky IV. I just hope it doesn’t end the same way. For the record, I think that Holyfield is going to lose the fight, but he is going to give it everything he has and put on a show for the fans.

I’m sure that you are wondering why this guy is still fighting. I've concluded that he is wired a little differently than most, and just can’t stop fighting. There is another reason. He's also doing it for the STRAIGHT CASH HOMEY!!!! For those of you that don’t know, he’s currently paying a mortgage on a $10 million mansion and allegedly thousands of dollars each month for child support. SO HE WON'T STOP, CAUSE HE CAN'T STOP! Every time I hear about Holyfield stepping back into the ring, in my head I hear P. Diddy's refrain from the Only You (remix) saying “I thought I told ya that we won’t stop, I thought I told ya that we won't stop.” I know that this has to be his theme song, because HE WILL NEVER STOP!!!!



****SPECIAL BIRTHDAY SHOUTOUT****
I would like to send a special HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BRITTANY, THE COOLEST 9 YEAR OLD IN THE WORLD!!!!


****NOTE****
FOR ALL OF THE REGISTERED VOTERS WHO HAPPEN TO LIVE IN GEORGIA THAT ARE READING THIS, I WOULD LIKE TO ENCOURAGE YOU TO VOTE ON DECEMBER 2nd IN THE RUNOFF ELECTION FOR ONE OF OUR SENATE SEATS. JIM MARTIN IS ATTEMPTING TO UNSEAT THE INCUMBANT SAXBY CHAMBLISS. THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT ELECTION, AND I AM URGING EVERYONE TO SPEAK UP AND LET YOUR VOICE BE HEARD THROUGH YOUR VOTE.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

I feel you. I truly do. The Real Deal is not apart of the elite scholars that roam the hallway of any school by far; however, much like a mosquito, I am often drawn by the lights of Las Vegas to watch the shocking event. Oh wait, he's banned from fighting there. Oh well! Evander often speaks of his spiritual leader, or messages by God himself. Hmmm. I wonder what religious sect that convinces a middle-aged man to keep fighting past his prime. I never have been a religious person, and probably never will turn my beliefs, but I guarantee you that those messages have to be clouded by now. Have you heard him speak lately? Please Evander, I'm begging you. Stop fighting shawty. It is only you and Hank Aaron left to rep the A! And by the way, I am truly embarrased to be from Georgia right now. Georgia voted for a man who didn't vote for Georgia's greatest son to have a holiday, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. I have been ridiculed in Pittsburgh by your performance.

Pharoah Goolsby said...

After taking repeated poundings to the skull Evander is not in his right mind. And even if he was he would probably still fight. That's the onlty way he is GUARANTEED straight cash, homey. George came out with a grill, Sugar a reality show, Ali a daughter...what i'm saying is these boxers have alternative sources of income.

Do boxers have a pension? They should, but it probably wouldn't matter because they would get swindled out of that as well. I've never been a fan of Holyfield. Big Tyson fan...in the ring...in his prime...up until Buster Douglas. He's a good fighter, apparently, he's a hard hitter...given the child support payments.

STRAIGHT CASH HOMEY!!!! said...

In response to the comment from carl....

You totally get where I was going with this blog. Logic would tell us that when a guy who's not the sharpest knife in the drawer to begin with gets punched in the head for a living, the knife will only get dull. At this point in his life Evander is no more than a butter knife. The sad thing is that bills and child support will keep him fighting well into his 80's. I admire his heart and will, but question his mental capacity. Like I said earlier to put his career in perspective, I was three years old when he had his first professional fight. Now I have graduated college, gotten married (shout out to my beautiful wife), started a career, started a blog, and started working on a MBA. I have done all of that and more since his first fight, and guess what, HE IS STILL FIGHTING!!!! It is now time for him to stop trying to prove that he is tough. We get it. Stop fighting already.

Great Job, thanks for the comment.

STRAIGHT CASH HOMEY!!!! said...

In response to the comment from pharoah goolsby....

You hit it on the head with this one. It's a shame because boxers seem to be the easiest athletes in the world to take advantage of. I wonder why that is? (rhetorical question) You also know that there is no pension for boxers and if there was some promoter will figure out a way to get their hands on it. I am a Holyfield fan, because he has heart and puts on a show every time he steps into the ring. He comes to fight and not to dance around the ring. As a boxing fan I can appreciate that. But enough is enough already. It is time to shut it down. I sincerely hope that he gets to shut it down by choice before someone shuts it down for him. I hate to say it, but I don't think that he will be doing it himself.