NOBODY’S PERFECT

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This has been by far one of the worst NBA regular seasons that I have ever seen. Due to the lockout, the NBA was forced to compress its season and squeeze 66 games into a four-month time span. As a result, teams have been forced to sometimes play three games in three nights. This has had an adverse affect on the quality of play. Injuries have increased due to the lack of recovery time between games, which forced a lot of players to miss a significant number of games. Coaches have also been resting star players more than usual in order to have them fresh and healthy going into the playoffs. This year the top teams have used the regular season to simply get in shape and fine tune their games for a playoff run. The general feeling coming into the season was that playoff seeding wasn’t important, teams simply wanted to get there in one piece. Once the playoffs begin they will be willing to take their chances on the road as long as they are equipped with a full complement of healthy players.

As we enter the month of May, it is time to see which team will peak at the right time and make a run at the championship. As we know, 16 teams make the playoffs in the NBA (8 in the East and 8 in the West). This is definitely too many teams, but that isn’t the point of this entry. (However, I did write a column about that for www.dailyshootout.com that will be available for you to enjoy some time this weekend. I will tweet the link once it’s available.) This season, of the 16 teams that qualified, I would say that six or seven are legitimate title contenders. The rest are simply increasing their cardio in preparation for next season. Looking at the playoff field, we all have our favorites to make it to the Finals. However, no team is perfect entering the playoffs.

**Before I get started discussing the legitimate playoff teams, I would like to make one blanket statement that will upset and/or offend the fans of several teams at once.**

This goes out to the fans in Orlando, Philadelphia, and Utah. Your teams have absolutely no chance of winning a playoff series this year. There is really no reason to go to the arena or tune in on television, unless you want to watch their opponents skillfully dissect them and extract them fro mthe postseason. To the players on those teams, I’m OK with you mailing it in; playing hard will only delay the inevitable. Just think, if you play hard and catch your opponent on an off night, you will do nothing more than tease you fans with a meaningless victory that will lead to absolutely nothing. So go ahead and give a half-hearted effort and go through the motions. Don’t worry, if the fans start to get mad at you, just tell them I said it was OK.

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s take a look at the other thirteen teams that actually have a chance to win a series or two, or three, or possibly four: Although they all look great on paper and in the eyes of their fans, every team entering the playoffs has a flaw that if exploited will bring their season to an abrupt end. Let’s take a look at them:

Chicago Bulls: Derrick Rose please give me a call, I want to introduce you to this dude that plays in Miami. His name is LeBron James, you may have heard of him. He’s the guy that will be guarding you if you so happen to face off in the Eastern Conference Finals. That my friend, will be a bad matchup for you. The Bulls are a team that plays hard every night. They finished the regular season with the best record in the NBA simply because they are a talented team that never takes a night off, which is rare in today’s NBA. However, the playoffs are not the regular season. The Bulls simply don’t have enough cumulative talent to win a title. They will easily win their first round series, but they will have a tough matchup in the second round if they face the Celtics. If they happen to get past them, the Heat will be waiting. Derrick Rose is great, and several of their other players are good. But they simply will not match up well against the other top teams in the East in a series where there are days off between games and they can focus all of their efforts and energy into stopping Derrick Rose. The Bulls have had a great season, and they will make a nice little playoff run, but they really don’t have a chance at winning the championship this year.

San Antonio Spurs: Somehow, someway, the old guys that meet every Thursday at 10am to play pickup basketball have managed to have the best record in the West. However, the experience that they used to navigate the regular season successfully can quickly turn into the age that will get them eliminated by a younger and more athletic team. Teams like the Lakers and Clippers will pose all types of problems for the Spurs with their young and athletic front lines. Seeing as how this is 2012 and not 2005, I think Blake Griffin, DeAndre Jordan, Pau Gasol, and Andrew Bynum are salivating at the opportunity to potentially face the undersized DuJuan Blair and a 36 year old Tim Duncan.

Miami Heat: Players one through three on Miami’s roster may be the best trio in the NBA, but players four through 12 aren’t much better than the Toronto Raptors. If Bosh, Wade, and James dominate, Miami will be the prohibitive favorite entering the playoffs. On the other hand, if James disappears and Bosh doesn’t play tougher than a 12 year old girl holding a baby-doll, Wade alone will not be enough to will them to a title. It’s put up or shut up time for the Heat, meaning that this is about the time that LeBron James starts playing like Marvin Williams and the Heat solidify themselves as the NBA version of the New York Jets—all talk.

Oklahoma City Thunder: The Thunder are a terrific team that many feel should win the West. They have a very good chance of winning the West, as long as their one glaring flaw is not exploited by an intelligent and capable opponent. The Thunder are strictly a jump shooting team. They do not have any thing that could potentially pass for a low post scorer. They run all of their plays to get jump shots for Durant, Westbrook, or Harden. This is a great strategy when their shots are falling. However, when their shots are off, things can get about as ugly as Sam Cassell. Playoff games are played at a slower pace than regular season games and a lot of focus is put on defense and half-court offense. At some point during the playoffs, a team is going to slow the game down and defend their jumpers very well. At that point OKC will be forced to manufacture points in the paint. Don’t get me wrong, Kendrick Perkins and Serge Ibaka are both very effective in their roles. Ibaka is the help side post defender and Perkins is the designated poster boy (shoutout to Blake Griffin). However their post games are about as developed as Waka Flaka Flame’s lyrical skills. The bottom line is that it’s hard to win a championship shooting jumpers; whether OKC can do it remains to be seen.

Indiana Pacers: The Pacers have a nice collection of talent. They are good at all five positions, but aren’t great anywhere on the floor. They are a very well coached team that gives maximum effort. However, you need a superstar to win in the playoffs, and they simply don’t have one.Paul George, Danny Grainger, and David West are all very good players. However, after they sweep the Howard-less Magic in the first round, they will be matched up against Wade, Bosh, and James. That’s where their lack of superior individual talent will become evident. It’s been a nice season but they simply don’t have the alpha male needed to win big in the playoffs.

LA Lakers: The Lakers have two concerns entering the playoffs. Kobe Bryant’s health and Mike Brown’s offensive playbook. We don’t know if Kobe is healthy, but even if he isn’t we all know that he will play well. Now to Brown, whose offensive playbook is about as thick as the “Clifford the Big Red Dog” books that I used to enjoy as a kid. Come to think of it, it’s so simpe that I wouldn’t be surprised if it was illustrated by the same person. For those of you that haven’t been paying attention, Mike Brown is the guy who coached Cleveland and called “LeBron top of the key isolation” about 937 consecutive times in a playoff series. I’m sure Kobe can’t wait to play the LeBron position on that play. If that happens, the Lakers will have the opportunity to watch the more innovative offenses in the league advance in the playoffs from the comfort of their homes.

Boston Celtics: This season Doc Rivers has proven that he can flat out coach his a$$ off. He has somehow turned this oft-injured team of senior citizens into legitimate championship contenders. As a matter of fact, the C’s are peaking at the right time. They have the best record in the entire NBA since the All-star break. The way the playoffs are setting up they will face Chicago in the second round instead of Miami. That is, if they get past the Hawks. Rajon Rondo is by far their best player, and the best point guard in the entire league. Moving Ray Allen to the sixth man role and Kevin Garnett to center have also proved to be brilliant moves. However, they are still OLD and lack a consistent clutch playoff scorer outside of the biggest crybaby in the NBA (Paul Pierce). Ray Allen’s health is also a bit of a concern. In order to win the title this year, Allen has to be completely healthy and on his game. Can the Celtics defy their age and make another title run? Yes! That is, if they can stay healthy.

Memphis Grizzlies: This team’s post-season chances will be determined by team chemistry. Zach Randolph returned from injury late in the season and Gilbert Arenas was a late season acquisition. If they can blend into a team that was good without them, they will definitely play a big part in taking the Grizzlies to the next level. This is a really good team that is good enough to win the West, provided that they prove to be alchemists and their chemistry experiment turns to gold instead of spontaneously combusting.

Atlanta Hawks: For my money, Jeff Teague should win the Most Improved Player award this season. He has developed into a mid-level starting point guard and he is still getting better. He even has an outside chance of developing into an All-star one day. Josh Smith has played like a man possessed this season. Truthfully, the team really hasn’t missed Al Horford at all, at least in the regular season. But now the playoffs start, where half court basketball and post-play is at a premium. The Hawks will definitely miss Horford if he is unable to play in the playoffs. The Hawks are a good team, but they have too many flaws to be a serious contender. Like LeBron James, Joe Johnson runs and hides when he has to make important plays on the big stage. The get-along gang that have been used at center (Zaza Pachulia, Jason Collins, and Eric Dampier) in Horford’s absence simply aren’t good enough. Then there’s the bench. When Teague, Johnson, and Smith need a breather they will be replaced with the likes of Jerry Stackhouse, Willie Green, Tracy McGrady, and Jannero Pargo. Need I say more?

Los Angeles Clippers: The loss of Chauncey Billups really hurt the Clippers. However, this is still a very good team. Chris Paul is almost as good as it gets at the point. Then there’s Blake Griffin, aka Kendrick Perkins Sr. (Yes I’m calling him Kendrick’s daddy). This is a young athletic team that is going to be a problem in the playoffs. However they have two glaring holes. Their bench is less than spectacular, and they are a REALLY BAD free throw shooting team. As a team, they only make 68% of their free throws. Their inside duo of Blake Griffin & DeAndre Jordan are each shooting 52% from the foul line. At this point, Shaq could probably help them improve their free throws. As I mentioned earlier, in the playoffs, the game slows down and teams generally don’t allow easy dunks and layups. This means that Griffin and Jordan will probably be attempting quite a few foul shots. Therefore, Habitat for Humanity should have someone at the games to catch all of their bricks and put them to good use by building homes for deserving families.

New York Knicks: It feels like this team has played three different seasons in this short 66 game schedule. First there was the season in which they sucked, then there was the season of “Linsanity,” and they just finished the Carmelo Anthony is an unstoppable offensive force season. Mike D’Antoni has been replaced by Mike Woodson; under Woodson they have played a lot better and would be a real threat in the playoffs if they didn’t have to open with Miami. Entering the playoffs, the Knicks have one glaring hole that will be exploited by any team that they face. They will start either Baron Davis or Mike Bibby at point guard. These guys have taken robbery to a whole new level. These are two players who have no business still being in the NBA. They are both offensive and defensive liabilities primarily due to health and laziness in Davis’ case and age in the case of Bibby. My only question is, “Do they show up in a mask and gloves to pick up their paychecks?” Since they have stolen a couple of million dollars hanging out with the team and contributing virtually nothing during the regular season, conventional wisdom would say that they feel obligated to repay the Knicks with great playoff performances. But guess what boys and girls, sense is not common and wisdom is not conventional. Bibby and Davis will give the team nothing and Miami will give them a quick exit. That being said, the LeBron-Carmelo matchup is sure to be a good one (remember LeBron doesn’t morph into Marvin Williams until they get deeper into the playoffs). 

Denver Nuggets: The Nuggets are the very definition of a team. The sum of their parts is much better than their individual pieces. They may even give the Lakers a run for their money in the opening round, especially if Kobe isn’t completely healthy and Bynum decides to shoot threes. They will be fun to watch and are a team that is easy to root for. However, like the Pacers, they lack the superstar that is necessary to win big games in the playoffs. When the game is on the line, they need a guy to step up and make the big play. Unfortunately, that player isn’t on their roster. So unfortunately, they won’t be winning the title this year. Let’s look at the bright side of things, at least they get to wear their really cool uniforms a little while longer. Things could be worse. They could lose in the playoffs and dress like the expansion Raptors. You remember those jerseys. They’re the ones that had the caricature of Chris Bosh on them (during the Vince Carter era).

Dallas Mavericks: What a difference a year makes. The defending champions blazed through the regular season last year, and they are simply using it to prepare for the playoffs this year. I’ve got bad news for the Mavericks and their fans. Last year you were experienced but this year you are just OLD. Yes, the Spurs and Celtics are also old. But they have youth at key positions that will allow them to compete. The Mavericks on the other hand are a year older everywhere. The Mavericks will open the playoffs against the Thunder and I’m guessing that Russell Westbrook will run Jason Kidd directly into retirement.

The bottom line is that no NBA team is perfect. Entering the playoffs, they all have flaws. The key to success is the ability to hide your flaws while exploiting those of your opponents. Sixteen teams are entering the playoffs. Three of them have absolutely no shot. They may as well go chill out and watch the games with Metta World Peace (since he has some time on his hands). The other thirteen will fight like hell for that gold trophy. In the end, the Thunder, Grizzlies, Heat, and Celtics will probably be left fighting for the right to go to the NBA Finals. Like all of the other teams, they have flaws, but I feel as though they will be able to mask them well enough to make it to the conference finals.

No matter who you root for, you will surely want to tune in and enjoy these playoffs. For a basketball fan, this is truly the best time of the year. March Madness is alright, and the NBA regular season provides lots of entertainment. But for a person who loves watching basketball played at its highest level, the NBA playoffs are heaven on earth. Will LeBron finally get his first ring? Will the pride and heart of the Celtics will them to another title? Will Joe Johnson finally live up to his contract? Will Carmelo Anthony carry the Knicks to places that no one could imagine? Will Amare Stodamire’s hair suddenly get long enough to justify having braids? We may not know the answer to these questions now, but we will by the end of the playoffs. LET THE GAMES BEGIN!

And now for my Baller & Scrub of the Week!

Baller: The Minnesota Vikings – Somehow the Vikings convinced the idiots that run the

Cleveland Browns to give them a 4^th, 5^th, and 7^th round pick to move up from the fourth spot to the third spot so that they could draft Trent Richardson. Don’t get me wrong, Richardson was a GREAT college player, and will probably be a GREAT NFL running back. He is by far the best back to enter the league since Adrian Peterson. But to give away three picks to move up one spot to take a player that there was a 0% chance of the team ahead of you taking is flat out STUPID! The Vikings somehow had convinced the Browns that another team was trying to move up into their spot to get Richardson. I seriously doubt that another team was willing to pay to get into the top three to draft a running back, but the Browns believed it. All in all it worked out for everyone. The Browns got the player that they coveted all along and the Vikings had a good laugh in their draft war room at the Browns’ expense.

Scrub: Michael Jordan – I know that it may seem blasphemous to some to call Michael Jordan a SCRUB, but I don’t care. I’m calling a spade a spade. AS AN OWNER MICHAEL JORDAN IS A SCRUB! I’m not going to go into detail about all of the moronic moves that he has made as the owner of the Bobcats (i.e. using a 1^st round draft pick on Adam Morrison) because that would make this already long entry about four pages longer. However, let’s just say that either he doesn’t care or he is incredibly stupid when it comes to making basketball decisions that don’t involve determining his next move while running the triangle offense. The Bobcats are bad, I’m sorry, that’s an understatement. THE BOBCATS ARE HISTORICALLY BAD! (that seems about right). The 2011-2012 Charlotte Bobcats are officially the worst team in NBA history, and they are led by the best player in NBA history. Go Figure! I understand that Jordan isn’t Jerry West or Pat Riley when it comes to making personnel decisions. I could live with the Bobcats not being an elite team, but the WORST EVER?! What happened to Jordan’s competitive fire? There was a time when Michael Jordan would trip up his mother to ensure that he won a race, but now he is simply content to fail. This is unlike Jordan. He is the man that made the NBA what it is today. He is the man that won 6 NBA Championships, 6 NBA Finals MVP’s, and 5 NBA MVP awards. He is also the only person that can force kids to skip school and adults to skip work to buy $200 basketball shoes. He has been successful at everything that he’s done (except hitting a curveball) prior to entering the management side of basketball. What is disturbing is that Jordan actually believes that he is doing a good job, and is committed to the plan that he has in place.

I hate to speak out of turn here, I mean I am just an engineer that enjoys writing about sports in his spare time. I am aware of the fact that Jordan has probably forgotten more about the game of basketball than I may ever actually know about the game of basketball. I get that, but I feel as though I must break the news to him, since no one else will. MIKE, YOUR PLAN IS NOT WORKING! IT’S TIME TO SCRAP IT AND TRY A DIFFERENT ONE! The definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing while expecting different results. I hope Jordan realizes that if he sticks to whatever plan he is currently operating under, that he will officially be considered insane.

If someone told me that I had to either have Gucci Mane perform at my next birthday party or have Michael Jordan own and operate my favorite NBA team, I would honestly ride with Gucci. That’s right, Gucci Mane is a better rapper than Michael Jordan is an owner. That pretty much sums up why I am calling Michael Jordan a SCRUB!




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ONE TRADE AWAY

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Before I get started with this week’s entry, let’s pay homage to Josh Smith’s posterization of yet another Oklahoma City Thunder big man. Serge Ibaka, smile on the count of three….





At this point there is only one team in the entire NBA that can win the championship. That team is the Miami Heat. They are far and away the best team in the NBA. Although the Chicago Bulls and Oklahoma City Thunder have comparable records, neither has a remote chance of beating Miami in a seven game series. The Bulls and Thunder are both good teams and on the surface they seem to be real competition for the Heat. However, the NBA has LOTS of bad teams (contraction is needed badly, and I’m sure that will be a blog entry at a later date), and it is easy for good teams to rack up wins. This is especially the case when good teams play extremely hard night in and night out as both the Bulls and Thunder do. As talented as the Bulls and Thunder are, fans in both cities may as well prepare themselves of falling just short of winning the title this season, unless….


THEY MAKE THE APPROPRIATE TRADE (or lineup change in the case of Oklahoma City).


There are several teams that are one trade away from being able to push the Miami Heat and possibly beat them in the playoffs. Being the benevolent young man that I am, I am going to save NBA general managers a lot of work by letting them know what move is needed to transform their team from a good team with absolutely no chance to win a championship to a great team that will be able to stand toe-to-toe with anyone in the playoffs, including the Heat.


Before I get to that, there is one thing that I must address concerning my hometown Atlanta Hawks. Starting (I still can’t figure out why) small forward Marvin Williams has reportedly requested a trade from the Hawks. (Marvin has denied this report, but I don’t believe him for one second) This begs the question ‘is Marvin assuming that another NBA team will actually want him?’ He is the worst starting small forward in the entire league. I am not exaggerating; he really is, for proof just read last week’s blog entry. No team will be stupid enough to take on Williams and the two years and roughly $15.7 million he has remaining on his contract after this season. The Hawks did call the University of Kentucky and try to trade him straight up for Michael Kidd-Gilchrist, but Caliparri turned them down with an emphatic HELL NO! So the Hawks are stuck with not only a scrub, but the worst kind of scrub; a disgruntled scrub. My advice to Marvin is to shut up and continue to be the bum that you are, and I will continue to talk about you on my blog for just that reason. Be glad that you are “stuck” in Atlanta and only have to deal with ATLiens like myself calling you a bust and a bum for a little while longer. (If you were to get traded to another market you would be opening yourself up to significantly more ridicule) In two years you will be out of Atlanta and on your way to play in Europe anyway. Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, where was I?... Oh yeah, trades for teams that are actually contenders.


Ray Allen to the Los Angeles Clippers – Although the Celtics pulled of an overtime win against the Knicks on Sunday, thanks largely to the monster game by my favorite NBA player (more on Rondo later), they are no longer real contenders. The Celtics are a prideful bunch that will fight their hearts out and give a valiant effort in the playoffs. That being said, they don’t hand out pride trophies in the NBA. The Celtics are old and staring the need to start over with youth directly in the face. It’s time to move the veterans, and a homecoming in Los Angeles for Ray Allen would be the perfect landing spot for him. The L.A. Clippers are a very good team with a gaping hole at shooting guard. Allen will be able to give them the shooter that will keep teams from double-teaming Blake Griffin in the post and also force them to play Chris Paul honestly. Allen is also battle-tested and knows what it takes to win a championship. He will keep this young team focused and provide a calming influence when the rigors of the NBA playoffs begin to rattle the young Clippers. It will probably take Mo Williams and a draft pick or a combination of Ryan Gomes, Eric Bledsoe, and a draft pick to get him. As long as it doesn’t take Paul, Griffin, DeAndre Jordan , or Caron Butler to get Allen, this is a deal that has to be made.


Pau Gasol to the Chicago Bulls – For some strange reason the Lakers’ are dead set on moving the most skilled big man in the game. We all know that he is soft, but he is also the most skilled post player to hit the NBA since Tim Duncan. For my money, I think the Lakers are idiots for trying to move him, but I’m sure that Derrick Rose and the people in Chicago are hoping that they send him their way. This is an easy trade to make. The Bulls will take on the Lakers highly skilled, but soft post player and send the Bulls their moderately skilled, but physically tough power forward in return. That’s right the Lakers should take back Carlos Boozer in return. Although Boozer is averaging nearly 19 points and 10 rebounds per game this season, he just doesn’t seem to be the right fit to play with Derrick Rose. I think he will be more valuable in Los Angeles where he can provide some toughness inside. Boozer’s and Gasol’s numbers this season are similar, so neither team will lose much production. However, stylistically I think both teams will be better off making this trade.


Rajon Rondo to the Los Angeles Lakers – Since I’m mentioning the Lakers, let me start by saying I HATE KOBE BRYANT! Now that that’s out of the way, let’s talk about the most obvious hole that any team in the entire NBA has. The Lakers simply don’t have a starting caliber point guard on their roster. In addition to not having a point guard on the team, the Lakers are also getting old and need an influx of youth to keep the team relevant for the next couple of years. As much as it pains me to say this, the team I hate the most is the perfect team to acquire my favorite player. Acquiring Rondo will give the Lakers young all-star level talent at the two most important positions on the court, point guard and center. They also have that other guy that I mentioned earlier that is still a top three player in the league. Rondo will lighten the defensive burden that Kobe has to handle on a nightly basis and also allow him to play off the ball more and get easy baskets. I don’t know what the Lakers have to offer the Celtics, except draft picks because they should be moving Gasol to Chicago for Boozer. There were rumors earlier in the season of a Gasol for Rondo swap, but that wouldn’t make sense because that would leave the Lakers with a gaping hole at power forward, unless they can figure out a way to get Luis Scola from Houston. The Lakers don’t have much on their roster that anyone else would want outside of Gasol, and Bynum (no need to mention Bryant here because we all know that he is untouchable). However, I’m sure that won’t stop them, because this is the team that managed to get Pau Gasol from Memphis in exchange for Kwame Brown, Javaris Crittenton, Aaron McKie, the rights to Marc Gasol, and a couple of draft picks. So basically Memphis got a bag of basketballs, 3 pair of NBA logo socks, and Gasol’s little brother (who eventually became a good player). Therefore, I truly feel that if the Lakers want Rondo, they will figure out a way to get him.


James Harden starts in Oklahoma City – As I stated last week, the Thunder are doing their opponents a huge favor by bringing their third best player off the bench. By simply inserting Harden into the starting lineup, the Thunder will have the most complete starting five in the entire league. They will have three scorers that can shoot from outside and blow past defenders. Their inside players (Perkins and Ibaka) and the perfect complement to such strong perimeter players. They are ego-less and love doing the dirty work, defending the basket and rebounding. Having Harden in the lineup will force the opposition to guard all three perimeter players and prevent them from letting one of their better scorers rest on defensive by guarding a player that is not a threat to score.


If the Lakers, Bulls, Clippers, or Thunder want to give Miami any real competition this summer, these moves absolutely have to be made. If they aren’t, the city of Miami may as well go ahead and approve police overtime to cover the parade.


This may sound crazy, but there is a way that my hometown Hawks can suddenly become real contenders. They just have to make the following move….


LeBron James to the Atlanta Hawks – I know this sounds crazy but it would give the Heat some valuable cap space. The Hawks will give up Marvin Williams (who is just oozing with potential) for James, who is clearly on the downside of his career. In addition to Williams, the Hawks will also give up Kirk Hinrich (that way Udonis Haslem won’t be the only Heat player rocking the always fresh Converse) and their next 5 first round draft picks. See that’s an offer that’s too good for the Heat to refuse. I’m sure that LeBron would welcome it also. He gets to play with Joe Johnson, who isn’t quite as good as Dwyane Wade, and Josh Smith, who is almost at the level of Chris Bosh. How can he turn down the opportunity to go to a slightly worse team in a city that doesn’t care about their sports teams unless they have a superstar. There’s the selling point, he IS a superstar. He can make an entire city give a damn about their home team. Who could possibly turn that down?


I know it will never happen, but a guy can dream!




And now for my Baller & Scrub of the Week….


BALLER – Rajon Rondo: He’s not getting this honor because he is my favorite NBA player or because he played for my favorite college basketball team. He is getting this honor because he (Ice Cube Voice) “messed around and got a triple-double” against the Knicks on Sunday. This wasn’t your run of the mill triple double, this one was special. He torched the “Chosen One” (Jeremy Lin) and the “Washed-up One” (Baron Davis) for 18 points, 20 assists, and 17 rebounds. Yeah, I think that deserves Baller of the Week status.


SCRUB – The NFL: Ok, the New Orleans Saints paid bounties to players for knocking opposing players out of games. That is wrong, we get that. However, let’s not get all crazy and act like this is some reprehensible act that you can’t believe is going on. Football players are wired a little differently from the rest of us. A defensive player’s entire existence (unless he plays corner) is based on the ability to knock someone’s block off. They do it week in and week out in exchange for their regular salaries. The bounty program wasn’t about the money, it was about recognition from teammates. If a player is making several hundred-thousand dollars per game, an extra $1500 isn’t going to make them want to hit any harder. They are always trying to knock players out of the game with every hit. I’m sure that the punishment for the Saints organization will be severe and will probably include a seven-figure fine, a lot of suspensions of players and coaches, as well as the loss of some draft picks. This will be simply to make an example out of the Saints. That is unfortunate because we all know that this happens in locker rooms all over the league. You can’t tell me that the Baltimore Ravens don’t have a standing bounty on Ben Roethlisberger. If you are going to make an example out of the Saints, you must conduct an investigation of the other 31 teams to see just how rampant this practice is and level them with the same punishments that you hit the Saints with.


This is strictly a public relations move. I wish the NFL would realize that you can’t make a gladiator sport safe. Your best bet is to make sure that everyone is well-aware of the dangers of the game at that level upon entering the league, and let the chips fall where they may. Football collisions have the same affect on the body as car accidents. This simply isn’t a safe sport. It’s a gladiator sport played by men with no regard for their physical well-being, or the physical well-being of their opponents. It’s time to stop pretending that it is anything else.




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GIVE THIS MAN A HUG

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Not only am I a huge sports fan, I am also a hip-hop head. No matter what I am doing, I am usually doing it while listening to music. I earn my living as an engineer, and whenever I am at my desk, you will usually find me with headphones on listening to music as I work. The same is true of writing this blog. Each week when I sit down to write, the first thing I do is open iTunes and decide on a playlist or album to write to. My musical choice is usually determined by my mood at the time or the topic that I will be writing about. Although I listen to a lot of Outkast and Jay-Z, you might catch me rocking to Lupe Fiasco, The Clipse, Jay Electronica, Kanye West, or even 2 Chainz (go figure). That being said, there is only one album that can provide the appropriate soundtrack for this week’s entry. That album is “Take Care” by Drake. Drake’s sophomore release is one of the dopest, softest, emotional, man law violating, I need a hug albums in the history of rap (I use the term rap loosely).

Drake is appropriate because today’s topic is the one and only LeBron James. Bear with me for a moment and I will explain why. For my money he is the best player in the NBA, and to be perfectly honest, second place isn’t even close. Anyone who says that LeBron James is not the best player in the NBA is either lying or related to another NBA player. In just his second NBA season James returned the Cleveland Cavaliers to respectability. Think about it, prior to LeBron’s arrival, the last respectable Cleveland basketball team featured Mark Price, Brad Daugherty, and Craig Ehlo. Yeah, that Craig Ehlo. You know I couldn’t mention his name without including a video of his crowning moment as a pro (please see clip below).





In his third season, the Cavs won 50 games and made the playoffs. This was truly amazing, especially when you consider who some of his teammates were that year. He had the honor of playing with such household names as Alan Henderson, Ira Newble, and Damon Jones (I promise you that I am not doing this on purpose, but we may as well look at the biggest highlight of Damon Jones’ career while we’re here).





LeBron spent the first seven years of his NBA career in Cleveland. During that time he led them to the NBA Finals once, the Eastern Conference Finals once, and the Eastern Conference Semi-Finals three times. It’s safe to say that he put Cleveland back on the NBA map.

After the 2009-2010 season, LeBron was eligible for free-agency. This gave him the right to play for any team that he chose. As we all know now, he chose to go to Miami. Who could blame him, he gave up the brutal Cleveland winters for South Beach. He decided to play with Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh instead of Jamario Moon and J.J. Hickson. Can we really blame him? It was his right to leave Cleveland, and he did. However there was one small thing that he did wrong. He decided to announce his “Decision” in primetime on national television. That was awfully arrogant, but again it’s his right. Oh yeah, there is one other small detail I failed to mention, Cleveland was his hometown team, so the people there kinda hate him now; which is their right as well.

LeBron’s decision to dump his hometown in front of the whole world, has led to something that he couldn’t have ever imagined, a backlash. No longer is he America’s sweetheart, the player that everyone admirers and loves. He is now public enemy #2 when it comes to athletes (behind Michael Vick of course). This is by far the most adversity that James has ever faced in his basketball career. They say adversity shows a person’s true character, and if this is indeed true, we now know that LeBron is about as tough as Drake’s music. I must admit, he had me fooled. Silly me, I thought that a 6’8”, 250 lb. man from the hood would be tough. I was wrong. Apparently LeBron is that dude that always went crying to his mother when someone took his toys. He has turned into a walking, talking pity party.

In Lebron’s first year with the Heat they made it to the NBA Finals, but I am still trying to figure out if he was there with the team or not. I watched the replays of the games on NBA TV during this off-season and I simply didn’t see him. As any superstar player should, he received a great deal of criticism for his no-show. He also started ducking the media after games because he couldn’t handle the fact that everyone noticed that Mario Chalmers was a bigger factor in the series than he was.

(Let’s pause a minute and let that last sentence sink in).

Needless to say James probably had the worst off-season of his career due to the way he played on the biggest stage. What I’m wondering is which bothered him more, losing the finals or being criticized?

This season, the Heat are off to another strong start and are the odds-on favorite to win the NBA championship. That being the case, you would think that all would be happy in LeBronville. Yet, he‘s still in a competition with Drake to see who can whine more about the downside of their fame and success. In an interview a few weeks back, Larry Bird was asked who he thought was the best player in the NBA. Logically, his answer was LeBron James. He was then asked which player playing today would he most want to play with. His answer was Kobe Bryant. Although I would never want to play with Kobe Bryant (because his teammates don’t get to play basketball, they simply do cardio while he plays basketball), I respect Larry’s OPINION. Bird was asked a question and his answer happened to be Kobe Bryant. While giving props to Kobe, Bird in no way insulted the “Sensitive One”. However, LeBron took it as a slight and responded by saying,

“I’m an easy target – let’s say that. When someone wants to get a point across, just throw LeBron’s name in there. If you’re watching cartoons with your kids and don’t like it you say, ‘Blame it on LeBron.’ If you go to the grocery store and they don’t have the milk you like you say, ‘It’s LeBron’s fault. I’m an easy target and I understand that. It doesn’t get me to me at all.”

Is he serious? All that from Larry Bird saying that he wanted to play with Kobe Bryant! It’s obvious that he needs a hug.

Needless to say the good people of Cleveland Ohio have yet to forgive LeBron for spitting in their faces in front of the entire country. To show their disdain for him, they BOO him profusely and hold up signs to express their feelings whenever he visits. This obviously bothers James and I’m sure he cries himself to sleep after each road game in Cleveland. Last week he decided to try to curb the vitriol shown to him by the Cav fans. He stated to reporters that he wouldn’t rule out a return to Cleveland at some point in his career. His selfish need to be loved by all led to him making an incredibly stupid statement and possibly alienating the organization that is currently paying him over $100 million for six years of basketball. Unfortunately for LeBron, he was still booed with each touch of the ball, and now stories are popping up all over the place about LeBron “plotting his return to Cleveland.” I’m sure the fans in Miami are loving that. Now we have a sensitive superstar that will soon have people in two cities hating him, but I’m sure he’ll handle that well. My advice to him is to win a championship this season in Miami and SHUT UP!

There are two things that I am certain that I never want to hear again, a Drake song about his struggles with fame and how it prevents him from finding true love, and LeBron James whining because the people don’t love him like they used to. I think they should just give each other a hug and agree to be one another’s sounding board and support system, because the rest of us are sick of hearing it!


And now for my Baller & Scrub of the Week….

BALLER – Kobe Bryant: It is well documented on this blog that I HATE KOBE BRYANT! Truthfully, I never thought I would see the day that I would actually give props to this _________ (fill in the word that you think I would have used), but I must applaud his comments to the Lakers management concerning Pau Gasol. The Lakers tried to trade Gasol before the season started, but were unsuccessful. Since the season has started, it has been rumored that Gasol was being traded to every team in the league and the Harlem Globetrotters. This has obviously had a negative effect on his play this season because his scoring average is currently at a career low (16.6 ppg.). We all know two things to be true about Pau. He is an enormously skilled post player, and he is about as tough as Keith Van Horn. That being said, I think it’s pretty safe to assume that he is a huge fan of whoever is the Spanish equivalent of Drake.

I have a new respect for Kobe (that will disappear as soon as I hit the “Post” button on this entry) for telling management that they need to either trade Pau soon or commit to not trading him. Bryant stated the obvious by saying that Gasol is not comfortable with the current situation and it is definitely affecting his play. I have always viewed Kobe as a selfish, me-first person. Actually I still do, but he has earned my respect for the next 15 minutes for sticking up for his soon to be ex-teammate. I will resume hating him in exactly 16 minutes, starting….now.

SCRUB – My (kinda) Boston Celtics: I am a person that roots for individual players more than I do particular teams. I have been a Boston Celtics fan for exactly 6 years, which is the exact number of years that my favorite NBA player (Rajon Rondo) has been a member of the team. So it’s fair to say that my allegiance is to him and not the actual franchise. That being said, the Celtics are terrible this season (15-16) and they are looking ancient in the process. It’s time for the C’s to shake things up and trade their one valuable asset (Rondo). In the process they will not only lose one of the best point guards in the league, but they will also lose a fan (me). Our loss may hurt them in the short term, but it will be better for them long-term. I just hope they trade us to a contender.


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A CHANGING OF THE GUARD

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I must admit that the combination of being done with school along with this beautiful Georgia weather has caused me to be quite un-disciplined with my writing. Admittedly, I have been spending all of my writing time and then some at the driving range trying to get the golf swing in shape. The hard work in paying off and I have gotten much better. However, I do now realize that I miss writing and it is time to (as Albert Haynesworth once said, but never did) “put my nose to the grindstone” and get back to work.

While watching these NBA playoffs, I couldn’t help but think of the opening line from one of my favorite songs, “My God” by Pusha T. The song opens with Pusha boldly proclaiming, “I can’t be bothered with paying homage to forefathers.” What he is saying is that although he is a rap veteran as a member of the critically acclaimed group, “The Clipse”, he is a new rolling solo and is here to take over the game. He has no time to honor to those who came before him, it is his time now, and he feels sorry for those stupid enough to try to get in his way. Apparently, I’m not the only person who loves this song, because I am convinced that it has been playing non-stop in the locker rooms of the Heat, Mavericks, and Grizzles. I say that because these three teams have been so disrespectful to the old guard of NBA championship contenders and decided that their time is now. When the season, and the playoffs for that matter started, most expected to see some combination of the Celtics, Spurs, and Lakers in the NBA Finals (for the record, I expected to see that Celtics and Lakers). However, it is now obvious that fear of these three teams is now all but gone among other NBA teams.

It all started when LeBron James decided to “take his talents to Miami”, and join forces with Dwayne Wade. They then decided to add one other sometimes significant piece, since the book (and candy bar) is called the “Three Musketeers” and not the two musketeers, they invited Chris Bosh along for ride. They came together for the sole purpose of taking down the mighty Boston Celtics, and take them down they did. They obviously didn’t get the memo (that I sent out) stating that Boston was supposed to win one more championship before they start collecting championship rings the way Bill Belichick collects draft picks. They made Boston look old and rattled, and they promptly eliminated them in five games. As it turns out, the series that everyone was looking forward to seeing, wasn’t very entertaining at all, because Miami chose not to pay homage to the team that inspired them to join forces and form a “Big 2….and a half.” They decided instead to simply whip their a$$.

Then we have the Dallas Mavericks, formerly known as the _allas Mavericks, because they never played any D. But for the first time in my life, this team seems, dare I say, TOUGH! Dallas has been an immensely talented team since Dirk Nowitzki developed into an elite offensive player. However, they have always lacked the requisite physical and mental toughness required to win an NBA championship. It seems as though, that has changed, and what better way to prove it to the world than to not only beat the Lakers, but SWEEP the Lakers in a playoff series. The Lakers are a physically tough team with the likes of Ron Artest and Andrew Bynum, and they possess arguably the most mentally tough player to grace NBA courts since “His Airness” in Kobe Bryant (OK, I deserve some credit for typing his name without calling him a &!%@$). It seemed to me that they broke the Lakers’ will in game one, by coming back from a 16 point deficit and beating them in LA. After that game, Kobe Bryant (I did it again, I didn’t call him a &!%@$) stated that he felt that Dallas could win that series. When has he ever admitted such a thing? This year’s version of the Mavericks is different from the team that squandered a 2-0 lead in the 2006 NBA Finals to an earlier version of the Miami Heat. In that series, Dirk played like a (insert word that I am avoiding calling Kobe Bryant) despite the fact that he was the MVP of the regular season that year. That playoff appearance, coupled with never reaching the finals again since has solidified his current reputation among NBA players, and fans alike. However, if both teams keep playing the way that they have in these playoffs, Dirk will get a chance to exercise HIS (not everyone else’s) South Beach Demons, while trying to prevent the Big 2-1/2 from winning the first of what I’m sure will be many championships.

Now to the most disrespectful team in the entire league, the Memphis Grizzlies. They actually had the audacity to lose games intentionally at the end of the season to ensure that they got the #8 seed in the playoffs. They wanted to ensure a date with the 61-win #1 seed San Antonio Spurs. How crazy is that?! The Spurs obviously knew that Memphis WANTED to play them, which prompted Tim Duncan to say, “I guess Memphis got the matchup they wanted,” before the series started. Well Tim, they did and they showed why. They obviously had no respect for a 4-time champion that was the best team in the league throughout most of the regular season. They knew that they had the match-ups to take you down, and no one outside of their locker room believed them besides Charles Barkley and me. To quote Pusha T one more time, they “Saw the future, like a car-show floor model” and you weren’t in it. Now they have an opportunity, with a win in this afternoon’s Game 7 against the Oklahoma City Thunder, to get to the place that you assumed you would reach, The Western Conference Finals. Don’t worry, you won’t be the only team missing that many expected to see. The Lakers will be absent as well. Hey, maybe you two can watch the games together, just a thought.

Not only has the NBA moved on from the Jordan era, it also seems as though it is now moving away from the Kobe (successful once again at not calling him a &!%@$), Garnett, and Duncan era as well. It is now time for these younger super-athletic teams to take the torch and carry the NBA forward. As I write this (on Sunday morning before Thunder-Grizzlies, Game 7), we know that either the Heat, Mavericks, Bulls, Grizzlies, or Thunder will win the championship this year. None of the remaining coaches have won a championship as a head coach, and none of the principle players for either team, outside of Dwayne Wade, (and I guess you can include Kendrick Perkins if you consider him a principle player, which I don’t) currently own a championship ring. These teams didn’t come here to honor those that came before them, they are here to write their own legacy. So sit back and enjoy it, because it will be highly entertaining.

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I’M BACK & HE’S HOME

Your eyes are not deceiving you; this is actually a new post from STRAIGHT CASH HOMEY!!!! I know that I have been away for almost two months, but they have been a very productive two months. Since I’ve been away, I have finished another semester of my MBA program (the last month of the semester was very tough, which was the predominant cause of the break). My beautiful wife also surprised me with a trip to Las Vegas to celebrate our second year of marriage (That's right, I married a sports fan who took me to Vegas, JACKPOT!), and I have also been traveling for work. Now I’m back and ready to resume work on STRAIGHT CASH HOMEY!!!! My course load for the summer is lighter than that of a normal semester, so hopefully, I will not have a long school induced break.

It must be a good week for sports fans because I am back and Michael Vick is back at home. This is a story that is near and dear to my heart. I am a huge Michael Vick fan and can’t wait to see him on the football field again. I am not going to take the time to get up on my soapbox about how ridiculous it is that Vick spent time in federal prison for dog fighting, while Leonard Little killed a person while driving drunk and only missed eight games, and while Dan Heatley formerly of the Atlanta Thrashers killed his teammate Dan Snyder in an auto accident while driving like a mad man, never served any prison time. I guess the American Justice System is telling us that the lives of dogs are more valuable than the lives of people. But like I said, I am not going to discuss this now. The fact of the matter is that Vick has been released, and should be reinstated into the NFL in time for the upcoming season if Commissioner Judge, Jury, and Executioner decides that he has served his debt to society.

I must admit, I have found some of the commentary about Michael Vick’s football future absolutely hilarious. There are some people who think that he will only be able to sign for the league minimum (somewhere between $500,000 and $800,000 for someone with his years of service in the league) once he is reinstated, due to the perceived baggage that he will take along with him to a new team. That is an absolute joke. He will receive a multi-million dollar contract simply because more than one team will be in the running for his services and the price will most certainly be driven up through sheer competition.

The other comment that I hear concerning Vick that I think is hilarious, is that he will never be able to play quarterback in the NFL again and that he will have to switch positions. If you want to know why I find this comment funny, simply click on the video below.



This clown is not only still in the NFL, he just received a new free-agent contract. So if he can play quarterback in the NFL, someone please tell me why Michael Vick can't.

Vick will be back in the NFL and he will be a quarterback. I am even willing to say that he will be a starter before the 2009 season is over. I know for a fact that he will not be welcomed back by the Atlanta Falcons. He totally screwed up his chance here and they have found their new quarterback in Matt Ryan. Arthur Blank and company have every right to move on with their lives without Michael Vick. I am guessing that one of the following teams will sign him (no inside information, just my gut feeling):

San Francisco 49er’s – They have a head coach with a strong personality in Mike Singletary and they don’t have a quarterback. He will be able to handle the media scrutiny. This would be a great fit. They also have Michael Crabtree, which would make for better Mike & Mike show than the one that comes on ESPN Radio in the mornings (in my opinion, that show is terrible).

Miami Dolphins – Bill Parcells was able to keep Lawrence Taylor as in check as a cocaine-using linebacker can be. Therefore the Michael Vick drama should be a piece of cake.

Oakland Raiders – Al Davis (need I say more)

Carolina Panthers – They need a quarterback more than they will ever admit (JAKE DELHOMME IS DONE!). They also have a strong running game and a good defense. They could play ball control offense with Vick, DeAngelo Williams, and Jonathan Stewart and really let Steve Smith do what he does best on the outside. Vick will make them a favorite to make the Super Bowl.

Arizona Cardinals – Vick can get in shape and work on his throwing as Warner finishes his career. They will need a quarterback soon because Matt Leinart simply is not the answer.

Tennessee Titans – They drafted the imitation, why not sign the real thing. Vick is what they thought they were getting in Vince Young. Also, Kerry Collins is near the end.

There are those who believe that Vick will reunite with Jim Mora Jr. and Greg Knapp in Seattle, but I don’t think that will or should happen. I know that Hasselbeck is done, but Vick is not the answer there.

I can’t wait to see Vick back on the field.

AND NOW FOR MY BALLER & SCRUB OF THE WEEK!

BALLER: The Orlando Magic & Denver Nuggets - You share this honor because you have showed up and played your butts off in the Eastern & Western Conference Finals respectively. The good people at Nike & Vitamin Water have all but written you off. This is obvious because they have been running Kobe v/s LeBron commercials since the playoffs began. In their eyes, you are nothing but a stepping stone. As a fan of the NBA and an even bigger fan of competitive games, I want to thank you for making both the conference finals an actual competitive series. You both have a legit chance of making it to the finals and you are proving to everyone that you aren't going to simply be "Witnesses" to the advertisers dream come true. (For the record, I am pulling for Cleveland & Denver).

(On a somewhat related topic, I noticed that Kobe is referred to as the Black Mamba in some of those commercials. Does anyone really call him that? I have never heard anyone call him that, and I think it is a stupid nickname. Also, who gave him that name. I hope he didn't give it to himself. Doesn't he know that you can't give yourself a nickname. Then it isn't a nickname, it's simply you wishing that you were someone else.)

SCRUB: NBA Commissioner David Stern - You get this honor for allowing companies to run ads basically foreshadowing a finals matchup BEFORE THE FINALS. You have already had a referee get convicted for fixing games, and many casual fans also believe that some games have been fixed in the past. (We aren't even going to get into the alleged frozen envelope during the 1985 draft lottery.) So if one or both of the conference finals go to a seventh game and Cleveland and/or LA win in a close game or on a questionable call, you are really going to open yourself up to criticism for fixing the finals for advertising dollars. Allowing these ads to run before the finals is really stupid, and for that you are my SCRUB OF THE WEEK.

Now for a totally non-sports related topic:

I am 27 years old, and a child of hip-hop music. Not the junk you hear on the radio today, I am referring to the music of rap's golden era, the 1990's. There are a few rappers that I listen to today. Among them are Outkast, Jay Z, TI, Lupe Fiasco, Talib Kweli, Lil Wayne and Mos Def, just to name a few. However, I must say that there hasn't been any new talent worth listening to in quite a while. That is until now. For those who appreciate good rap music and is disgusted by the junk that is on the radio today, I recommend that you check out a new artist (as Ghetto Mafia would say) that is Straight from the DEC (Decatur GA). He goes by the name of B.O.B. He is the real deal and the future of hip hop. But don't take my word for it, simply click on the link below.