Sunday, March 25, 2012

WEDNESDAY

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Those who read this blog each week have come to expect my take on the current events that are happening in the world of sports (along with some bold predictions which, more often than not, turn out to be accurate). To provide you this rousing entertainment I not only keep up with the sports news, but I am also constantly coming up with ideas that I feel will make an interesting blog topic. Once I get one of these ideas, it is documented and cataloged accordingly. When nothing interesting happens during the week, I then retrieve said topics from the aforementioned catalog and begin to write the week’s entry. For instance, the recent blog entries entitled “The Anti-All-Star Team” and   “No Respect!” both came from the catalog. Coming into this week I knew a couple of interesting things could happen, but I was also prepared to go to the stacks and pull one of the more interesting topics out for my blog entry. I had that topic picked out and had actually started constructing a mental rough draft. That was Tuesday. Then the calendar turned to Wednesday, March 21st. suddenly, the week got extremely interesting.

On Tuesday, March 20th Peyton Manning chose to take his talents to the Rocky Mountains. He chose Denver over San Francisco and Tennessee. This wasn’t a huge surprise because most of the reports about his potential landing spot mentioned that his heart was in Denver. (Thus, this event alone would not have made a very interesting blog topic.) Peyton really didn’t want to play in the NFC, and he wanted to play with an organization that would throw out their offensive playbook and let him bring his own. Those preferences were strong indicators that Denver would be his landing spot. For about 24 hours the fact that Manning chose the Broncos was the hottest topic of discussion in the sports world. When I heard the announcement my first question was, “Where are they sending Tim Tebow?”

Anyone who knows anything about Peyton Manning knows that he is not a big fan of distractions. He is a creature of habit that needs things to be a certain way in order for him to function. His life is all about football, and he really has little use for anything else. In Denver, that “anything else” would come in the form of crazed Tim Tebow fanatics. Tim Tebow fans love him for reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with football. That being said, there would be a faction of them that would be there to heckle Manning and call for Tebow at home games. They would also be stupid enough to call into Denver talk radio and state idiotic reasons why Tim Tebow is better than Peyton Manning. Then there will be the billboards and websites calling for the benching of arguably the best quarterback to ever play in the NFL in favor of a bad passer who still can’t read a Cover 2 Defense. Needless to say, Manning wasn’t going for that. Therefore, I wouldn’t be surprised if the following conversation happened between Manning and Vice President of Football Operations, John Elway:

Manning: I’d love to come here John, but there is no way that I’m dealing with those crazed followers of the Church of Tebow.

Elway: Go ahead and hop on a plane, he’ll be gone by the time you get here.

Manning: On my way.

Elway: Yes! (heard in the background talking to his assistant) Get Tim’s agent on the phone.

Conventional wisdom said that Tebow would be traded to the Jacksonville Jaguars. They have a terrible quarterback in Blaine Gabbert (he’s not rookie-qb bad, he’s can’t play in the NFL bad), and a stadium that they have given up trying to sell out. However, conventional wisdom was wrong in this situation. As we all now know, Tebow won’t be heading to his hometown to fill the stadium with people desperate to see him set the quarterback position back 40 years. Instead, he is going to the New York Jets to make Mark Sanchez’s already miserable existence even worse. Nothing says, "we don’t have any faith in the abilities of our quarterback" like bringing in Tim Tebow and saying that you will be developing a package of plays to get him on the field. This trade proves that Mark Sanchez’s new “contract extension” is in reality about as valuable as the paper it was written on. Anyone who follows the NFL knows that the contracts are never as valuable as reported, and this one proves that the Jets were only publicly supporting Sanchez for the sake of his confidence, not making a real commitment to him for the future.

As regular readers of this blog know, I think that Tim Tebow is the worst quarterback to ever take a snap in the NFL (yes, I am old enough to remember Akili Smith, Cade McNown, and Joey Harrington). However, I will say (I can’t believe I’m about to say this) that I would rather have him over Mark Sanchez.  After watching the Broncos-Jets game last season, I came away convinced of two things. I had just witnessed the worst display of offensive football to take place in my lifetime, and that Tim Tebow is a better football player than Mark Sanchez. Although I would NEVER want either of them on my team, if I HAD to choose, I would rather have the quarterback that will play terribly for 3-1/2 quarters and then make one big play late in the fourth to win the game (if my defense can keep it close), than have a quarterback that will just play horribly for four quarters and never give me a chance to win.

Mark Sanchez’s days with the Jets are numbered. He will enter the season as the starter, but once he has his first three interception game the “We Want Tebow” chants will start, and Jets fans will start Tebowing in the crowd. This pressure will definitely make such a weak-minded individual fold.  This will lead to him playing even worse, and eventually he will be benched. This situation is similar to the one that the Eagles had when they traded Donovan McNabb. Publicly the team stated that Kevin Kolb would be the starting quarterback, but privately, they were just waiting for Kolb to give them a reason to replace him with Michael Vick.

To the executives at HBO, I will gladly pay double for my HBO service if you do a second installment of Hard Knocks from the Jets training camp. If this happens we will get to witness Tim Tebow’s ears bleeding every time Rex Ryan speaks, Santonio Holmes having an emotional breakdown because neither quarterback on the roster can complete a pass to him, and members of the Jets defense constantly complaining because they know that giving up more than 10 points in a game will certainly lead to a loss. The official title should be, Hard Knocks: The Jets Training Camp part 2 – The Season is Over Before it Begins. (Note to HBO: please write the check to Straight Cash Homey if you use that title.) Although distractions and controversy will ensure that the Jets have a horrible season this year, they will still be entertaining as hell to watch.

And now on to the New Orleans Saints (you knew it was coming)….

The Tebow trade wasn’t the only big news from Wednesday. There was also the announcement of the punishment of the New Orleans Saints for their bounty program.

One second, before I finish writing this I am going to send a tweet to Commissioner Goodell (@nflcommish) to see how his hand is holding up after he PIMPED SLAPPED the New Orleans Saints. My tweet to him reads:

@nflcommish after pimp-slapping the #saints organization, how’s the hand holding up? I hope you used lots of ice.

I will let you know if he actually responds in my next blog post.

You know they say, “There are only two things guaranteed in life, death and taxes.”  Well, I’d like to add a third thing to that list. Lying to Roger Goodell will have severe consequences. If you don’t believe me, ask Michael Vick. On the surface, It appears that Goodell came down on the Saints awfully hard for their illegal bounty program. The penalties include:

- A one year suspension for Head Coach Sean Payton

- An indefinite suspension for former Defensive Coordinator Gregg Williams

- An 8-game suspension and $500,000 fine for General Manager Mickey Loomis

- A $500,000 fine for the organization

- The loss of their 2nd round draft picks in the 2012 & 2013 draft.

In actuality, the biggest crime that the Saints committed was not the bounty program itself, but lying about it. Prior to the investigation that lead to this penalty, the NFL told the Saints that they had heard allegations of a bounty program. They also told the Saints that if the allegations were true, the team should end the program immediately. The NFL also let them know that they would be investigating the issue. At that point, most normal people would end the program. Apparently the Saints felt as though they could continue the practice and cover it up so that the league would not find out about it. Needless to say, they were incorrect. Thus they had to feel the backside of the Commissioner’s right hand.

As I stated in a previous entry, I am not naive enough to believe that the Saints were the only team to have bounties on opposing players. However, the Saints were the only team stupid enough to continue the program while being investigated by the league. Football is an extremely dangerous sport. It isn’t a contact sport, it’s a collision sport. Due to the amount of violence in the game, each player should thank the diety that they pray to after every play, simply for surviving. The game is dangerous enough when being played within the rules, but Gregg Williams decided to make the game even more dangerous by giving his players incentives to intentionally hurt opposing players by any means necessary. The highest level that Williams reached as a football player was Division II Northeast Missouri State University (we all know that all multi-direction state universities suck at sports). Needless to say, Williams never played in the NFL, which is why I am not surprised that he has such disrespect for the integrity of the game. He has never felt the violence of an NFL game first hand. If he had, I doubt he would be providing incentives to intentionally hurt opposing players. Also worth noting is the fact that Sean Payton, who let this happen on his watch, was a replacement player during the 1987 NFL player strike. In short, he never had the talent to play in the NFL, but jumped at the chance to play in the place of the players that he was not good enough to compete with. This shows that he, along with Williams never had the proper respect for the health and safety of the elite athlete’s that neither of them were good enough to be.

While listening to NFL radio this week, one thing was extremely clear. Saints fans HATE Roger Goodell for what “he did to their team.” I am in no way a Goodell supporter, as a matter of fact, I like him about as much as I like those clowns that run the NCAA. That being said, Saints fans have it wrong on this one. Gregg Williams, Sean Payton, and Mickey Loomis did this to the Saints, not Goodell. The commissioner even gave them an opportunity to clean up their act. They chose not to, so he chose to put the smack down. Saints fans must realize that this decision was not about football. As one of my friends and loyal reader of this blog mentioned to me this week, “Everything Goodell is currently doing is to set up the league’s defense to the huge lawsuits that are coming from former players.” He is correct (I love having smart friends). This punishment was not about the Saints, it was about public perception and the financial future of the NFL. Someone had to be the example, and the people that run the New Orleans Saints practically raised their hands and volunteered.

To add insult to injury, next year’s Super Bowl will be played in New Orleans. Thanks to the penalties brought forth by the bounty program. I am virtually certain that the Saints will not be the first team to play in the Super Bowl in their home stadium. This punishment of the Saints is basically the same as a kid being on punishment for his 7th birthday, but his parents decide to still have the party, which the kid isn’t able to attend. While the party is going on, he is up in his room listening to his friends enjoy his cake and his presents. A party will be going on in New Orleans next February, it’s just too bad the Saints won’t be invited.

Although the organization has been hit hard, we must keep in mind that they players involved in the bounty program have not been punished, yet. I expect the punishment to be severe. Apparently the Saints do as well. This weekend they signed middle-linebacker Curtis Lofton (formerly of the Falcons). Your initial thought may be that this was a bad signing because the Saints already have Jonathan Vilma (who was the primary player linked to the bounties). I have a feeling that after the player discipline is announced, we will be saying the Saints HAD Jonathan Vilma.



And now for my Baller & Scrub of the Week….

BALLER – Jeff Teague: In a battle between my hometown NBA team (Hawks) and my favorite NBA team (Celtics), Jeff Teague decided to POSTERIZE Jesus Shuttlesworth (a.k.a. Ray Allen). Dunks like this, especially from a point guard, earns you Baller of the Week status (please see video below). Later in that same game, with the Hawks down three and only seven seconds to play, Teague put up an air ball on the potentially game winning shot. The Hawks lost the game, but that doesn’t take away from Teague’s dunk. Although this may be a bittersweet honor for Teague, it’s still an honor.


SCRUB – Mark Sanchez: Relax Mark, you didn’t do anything to earn Scrub of the Week honors this week. I am just practicing for the season. I have a feeling your name will be in this spot a lot this season.


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Monday, March 19, 2012

WHAT A WEEK!

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WOW! This has been one exciting week for sports fans. We were able to witness the perfect storm. This week brought us the beginning of NFL free agency, the NBA trade deadline, and the start of the NCAA tournament. Each of these events is a story within itself and have dominated the headlines on ESPN and the various sports websites, but having them all occur at once really provided those who love and follow sports as I do, with information overload and an overall awesome week. Some of the things that occurred this week were totally expected, but some were serious head-scratchers. If you know me and this blog, I am going to talk about the head scratchers, the things that make you go HMMMM! (shout-out to those old enough to remember Arsenio Hall). There were plenty of them. Let’s discuss, shall we:

The Tim Tebow’s Throwback Jersey: As I walked out of my office today, I received a text message from a friend with something that he read on twitter. It read, “Tim Tebow’s Broncos jersey is now a throwback.” I found that to be hilarious. It’s funny, because it’s true. Now that John Elway has finally convinced a real quarterback who can read a defense and throw the forward pass to come to the mile high city, Tim Tebow is expendable (personally, I thought he was expendable on draft day). Tebow is now officially on the trading block and will probably end up with Miami or Jacksonville, two teams that desperately need to sell tickets. Neither team will be any good this year regardless, so as they say in the NFL, it’s better to be terrible in front of a sellout crowd than to be terrible with no one watching.

Mario Williams to the Buffalo Bills: Prior to last season, I adopted the Buffalo Bills as my favorite NFL team (I had to pick a new team since I knew the Peyton-less Colts were going nowhere fast). Many of my friends thought that I was crazy, but I looked at that roster and knew that they could surprise everyone and take the league by storm. In the end they only ended up taking the league by scattered showers, but they did make me look like a genius for the first half of the season. I am not a bandwagon fan, so I am sticking with MY Bills for this season also. I fully expect them to win the AFC East, and I am saying that with even more confidence since they landed Mario Williams. That’s right, a young, rich, black professional athlete has chosen to play for a team located in Buffalo, New York. I have heard from some people who feel as though he is going to Buffalo only for the STRAIGHT CASH HOMEY!  I disagree with that sentiment because his market was going to be approximately $50 million guaranteed no matter where he went. I think Mario sees what I see in Buffalo. A team that has a legit number one receiver (Stevie Johnson), a stud running back (Fred Jackson), a rising star at quarterback (Ryan Fitzpatrick), and a strong defensive line that he will be able to add to (featuring Marcell Dareus and Kyle Williams). Buffalo also plays a 4-3 defense that suits Williams’ skill set and body type much better than the Texans’ recently implemented 3-4 defense. Although they are a part of the game, injuries derailed the Bills playoff chances last season. With the re-signing of Stevie Johnson and the acquisition of the best defensive free agent since Julius Peppers, I am expecting big things from MY Bills this season. When Williams was drafted ahead of Reggie Bush in 2006 many laughed and thought that Houston had blown it (I am included in that group), but Williams has shown that he was indeed the right pick. Too bad they won’t get to reap the benefits of having him during his prime. GO BILLS!

Brandon Marshall is a Bear: I know that he is somewhat of a head case, and I also know that he is always prone to making headlines off the field. However, in case you haven’t noticed BRANDON MARSHALL IS REALLY GOOD!  In his five years as a starter, Brandon Marshall has averaged 95 catches, 1,188 yards, and 6 touchdowns. You simply don’t give that away for two 3rd round draft picks. This is the NFL, not the Boy’s Scouts. On-field production trumps everything in this league as long as you don’t kill the chemistry of every team that you play for (yeah, I’m talking to you T.O).  Lawrence Taylor & Michael Irvin snorted more snow than Buffalo residents shoveled this winter, and they were never traded.  As a matter of fact, Irvin only had one season where he had more catches than Marshall has averaged over his last five seasons. The Rams never traded Leonard Little, and we all know that he did the unthinkable. In a passing dominated league where choir boys are few and far between, you can’t practically give away a legit number one receiver. 

Dwight Howard is traded to NOWHERE!: To quote Shakespeare, the Dwight Howard trade discussion was “much ado about nothing." (Yes, I just quoted Shakespeare in a sports blog) At various points of the season, it was rumored that Howard would be traded to the Nets, Rockets, Lakers, Knicks, Bulls, and Warriors. Then Howard stated that he didn’t want to leave Orlando after all. Then he decided that he did want to leave. Then he decided that he wanted to stay again. Then the Magic owner offered to let him decide the fate of the general manager and head coach if he stayed. Then he decided that he wanted to finish the season in Orlando and be a free-agent this summer (which is understandable because a trade would gut any team that he is traded to). Then Orlando demanded that he waive the right to opt-out of his contract if he wants to stay. Then he decided that he did not want to offer any guarantees. Then he decided not to opt out of his contract, and play out the full contract, which ends after next season. To make a long story short, we will have to go through all of this again this summer and possibly throughout next season. The only people who are happy about this are ESPN and NBA TV, because they just got a lot of programming hours placed in their laps (prepare yourself for “The Decision—The Sequel”).

Rajon Rondo is still a Celtic: The Celtics elected to keep their team together for the remainder of the season. They had unrealistic expectations of the value that Garnett, Allen, or Pierce would return in a trade, and they couldn’t fleece another organization in exchange for Rondo, like the Lakers did Memphis to get Pau Gasol. Oh well, I guess my boy Rondo will play out the rest of the season with the AARP all-stars and go into next season with a fresh round of trade rumors. This off-season, he should demand a trade and put an end to this constant state of limbo that the Celtics front office seem to always have him in.

Pau Gasol is still a Laker: This one is funny because Gasol was actually traded before the season started, but Commissioner Stern pulled the plug on it. The Lakers have also been openly shopping him for everyone in the league that is under 28 years old. Yet, they were unable to move him at the deadline. These distractions have definitely affected his play this season. Much like Rondo, everyone expected him to be moved (possibly in exchange for Rondo), yet he is still a Laker.

Dook Bounced from NCAA Tournament: As a Kentucky basketball fan, I am required to follow Rule #37 in the “Kentucky Fan Rule Book.” This rule states that you must always hate Dook. You must root against them against all other opponents and rejoice every time they lose (Rule #19 states that you must always refer to them as Dook instead of Duke).  Therefore I was just as happy when Dook lost to the 15th seeded Lehigh, as I was when Kentucky beat Iowa State to advance to the Sweet 16.

Missouri Ruined My Final Four: As I stated last week, I felt as though The Final Four would end up being Kentucky, North Carolina, Syracuse, and Missouri. Well, the good people at Norfolk State University obviously didn’t agree with my prediction. They went ahead and bounced Missouri from the tournament and (along with Lehigh) screwed up everyone’s bracket. The fact that a pair of 15th seeds beat #2 seeds in the same day is a sign. Although it has yet to happen, the day is coming when a #16 seed is going to beat a #1 seed. I just hope that your favorite team isn’t the victim.                            

And now for my Ballers & Scrubs of the Week….

BALLER #1 – Peyton Manning: Its official, Peyton Manning is the powerful man to walk the earth since Joe Clark (those who have seen the movie “Lean on Me” will get that one).  He single-handedly put every quarterback in the league on notice that he could have their job if he wanted it. He chose Denver, which hopefully will make the Tim Tebow story disappear as quickly as the Jeremy Lin story did. The other finalists were Tennessee and San Francisco, but that’s not the point. The point is that he held every quarterback in the league and every team’s salary cap space hostage until he made HIS decision! A power move like that earns you Baller of the Week status.

BALLER #2 – C.J. McCollum: Let me guess, you’ve never heard of C.J, McCullom. Well, neither had I until he dropped 30 on Dook on Friday night. He is not only Lehigh’s best player, but he was the best player on the floor on Friday night. I don’t know much about Mr. McCullom, but based on the fact that he plays his college ball in a brown uniform for Lehigh, I’m going to guess that the traditional powers (Kentucky, Dook UNC, Kansas, etc.) weren’t exactly knocking down his door to convince him to come to their school. I think it’s safe to say that this is an underrated recruit that got away. He is the two-time Patriot League player of the year, and the guy who is most responsible for the tears of embarrassment that flowed in the Dook locker room on Friday night. For that, I am making him an honorary Kentucky Wildcat. I’m a big fan of anyone who can make Dook players cry.

SCRUB #1 – Jim Harbaugh (49ers Coach), Bud Adams (Titans Owner), Ken Whisenhunt (Cardinals Coach):  Personally, I don’t blame you for openly professing your love for Peyton Manning and your desire to sign him even at the expense of the quarterback(s) currently on your roster. However, now that you have basically called your current quarterbacks scrubs in the national media and members of your teams have been gushing about the possibility of playing with Peyton on ESPN and on twitter, you must now try to profess your love to the quarterbacks that you were previously ready to dump. They now feel like your back up plan, and no guy ever really wants to marry their back up plan.  However, you must now try to make them feel special again. Good Luck with that!

SCRUB #2 – NFL Ownership: I’ve always felt that this is a shady bunch of individuals that are not to be trusted. This thought was re-affirmed when Roger Goodell (their hired goon) announced that the Dallas Cowboys and Washington Redskins would be docked salary cap space for, get this, OVER SPENDING IN AN UNCAPPED YEAR! The obvious question here is, “How can a team spend too much money in a year when there was no salary cap?” This was an obvious attempt of collusion of the owners against the players. Although there was no salary cap, the owners made an un-gentlemanly and ILLEGAL agreement amongst each other to not spend more than a certain amount on player salaries for that year. Needless to say, two of the most hated owners decided not to join their fellow owners in the sneaky undertaking. Now the other owners are trying to retaliate. Well, here’s the problem with that. Jerry Jones and Daniel Snyder live by their own rules and will not let the other owners bully them. Needless to say, a law-suit is coming, and I fully expect the Cowboys & Redskins to be victorious.


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Tuesday, March 13, 2012

EVERYONE’S A SPORTS FAN

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I am a sports fan, and I assume that everyone that is a regular reader of this blog is as well. As sports fans, we enjoy watching, playing, and following the daily news of our favorite sports. ESPN is the television staple for sports fans; we go to bed at night and wake up in the morning to Sportscenter trying our best to convince our significant other that each airing is in fact a new edition. As sports fans we tend to associate with other sports fans (birds of a feather…as they say). It’s nice to have friends that enjoy the same sports as we do, and we enjoy watching the games with them whether we root for the same or rival teams. For those of us that are truly fortunate, we will marry a fellow sports fan (which I did). Which means that sports will never be one of the things you have to sacrifice when making the usual compromises that come with marriage. All in all, being a sports fan is awesome because it gives us an escape from the rigors of everyday life, and a hobby to be passionate about.

Most sports fans have a certain sport or sports that they follow very closely. Personally, I love the NFL and NBA above all others. However, I also follow college basketball closely, and I stay in tuned with the on-goings of college football (although I only watch a few full games each season). I am also a golf fan (and a bad golfer), and I keep tabs on NASCAR and MLB. As for hockey, I’m a 30 year old black man raised in the south. That should explain my interest in hockey. We in the community of sport fandom have different levels of passion about a wide variety of sports, but our devotion to those interests connects us with other fans around the globe. This is a special and unique community eleven months of the year. In March however, there is nothing unique about being a sports fan, because everyone suddenly becomes a sports fan, or at least a fan of college basketball.

Strange things start to happen once the calendar turns to March. You suddenly don’t mind hearing that cheesy “One Shining Moment” song every time you turn to CBS. Your company totally ignores the corporate policy on gambling and turns a blind eye to all of the tournament pools taking place in the office. People who don’t know the difference between dribbling a basketball and dribbling a soccer ball are suddenly into college basketball and filling out brackets. I rarely, if ever, fill out a bracket. The odds against getting it right are astronomical, so I just don’t take the time to do it. Plus, if I did fill them out, Kentucky (the college basketball team that I have been following since my youth) would always end up winning. The best and most amusing thing about this college basketball phenomenon is the strategies used by others when filling out their bracket. Some of them include:

Picking the Best Team – This is the method that I would prefer if I filled out a bracket (with Kentucky always winning every game, of course). This method is used by the college basketball fan that really follows the sport. They know (or think they know) the advantages and disadvantages of each team in every matchup. They fill out their bracket with first-hand knowledge of the teams involved.

Conference Affiliation – Die-hard college sports fan are fiercely loyal to their conferences. If their team can’t win, they would rather a team in their conference win. This is strictly for bragging rights. If they can’t say Roll Damn Tide! They’d at least like to be able to shout SEC! SEC! SEC!

Chalk – In this situation the highest seeded team will win every game in the tournament. This will NEVER happen in a 68 team tournament.

Cutest Mascot – This one is understandably more popular with women. I’m not saying that it can’t work, but I am saying that the University of Georgia has never won the tournament. Personally, I don’t think that dog they have for a mascot is all that good-looking.

Which Mascot Would Win A Fight – Let’s just say, this is probably why the Fighting Okra of Delta State don’t play Division 1 basketball. Obviously, they wouldn’t have a chance.

Then there’s my personal favorite. I promise you I am not making this up. Please keep in mind that I earn my living as an engineer, thus my co-workers are also engineers.

Two years ago, one of my co-workers was filling out his bracket. He went to a small school in the Northeast that will never win the NCAA tournament, neither will any team from the conference that they play in. Therefore, it was obvious that he wasn’t filling it out for his team or a fellow conference member to win. Instead, his chosen method was….

Which School Would Win in a Fight – After hearing this, I immediately thought that he would simply pick the school with the worst academic reputation to win each game. I was assuming that he would equate partying, drinking, and not doing well academically with the ability to fight. Boy was I wrong! In fact, he had the opposite strategy. He picked the engineering schools with the best academic reputation to win each game, because they have the intelligence to build better weapons and defense systems to be used in combat. I am not making this up! Using his logic, if MIT ever figures out how to apply that brain power to the hardwood, the tournament will never be the same.

Lines on paper (otherwise known as brackets) have helped make the NCAA tournament the multi-billion dollar enterprise that it has become. I hope the enterprising person who figured out how to get the whole country interested in the tournament has received some benefits from this tremendous idea. There isn’t much that the NCAA does right. In fact the NCAA tournament in the only thing that I think they do get right. It is only rivaled by the Super Bowl when you think of championships creating excitement for their sport. Think about it. The only people who give a damn about the World Series are people who live in the cities that are participating. The NHL, really? I challenge anyone to name the last three Stanley Cup Winners. The NBA is all about stars, so casual sports fans don’t really care which teams are playing in the finals, they are more concerned about which individual players are playing. As for college football, thanks to the recent dominance of the SEC, it has pretty much become a regional sport, almost like NASCAR (I know people in Big Ten country and on the west coast aren’t going to like that).

The NCAA tournament has something to offer for everyone. If you are a college basketball fan, you get to see the 68 best teams in the country battle for the title. If you are a casual fan, you get to stop by some pretty good games while channel surfing and realizing that nothing else is on. If you’re not a fan at all, you still get to pretend to know sports by filling out your bracket and joining your office’s “only legal in March” gambling pool.

As it always does, this year’s tournament will feature some monumental upsets, and some surprisingly close games. A twelve seed will definitely beat a five seed in the first round, simply because it happens every year. When this happens, fans and the media will absolutely love it. Everyone loves the story of the underdog taking out the favorite in the tournament. We are a country that loves seeing David slay Goliath. This is where I differ from most. While I don’t mind seeing an early round upset or two during the first week of the tournament, by the time we get down to eight teams, I root for Wal-Mart! I want to see the super-powers square off. The Butler’s and VCU’s of the world are nice stories, but they have no place in my Final Four. I am hoping to see Kentucky, Syracuse, North Carolina, and Missouri in the Final Four. They have been the best four teams all season and they all play in big boy conferences. Will it happen? Probably not, but that’s the fun of this tournament. None of us know what’s going to happen.

And now for my Baller & Scrub(s) of the Week….

BALLERNCAA Tournament Selection Committee: You may want to take a screenshot of this section and frame it, because I NEVER GIVE THE NCAA PROPS FOR ANYTHING! This is the most asinine group of administrators in the history of the world. Yet, they manage to do a great job with the tournament year in and year out. Some years the tournament is not very exciting, but that is a product of how the teams play, not which teams are invited. Also, if you are a coach, team, or fan that feels as though you were snubbed, GET OVER IT! If you weren’t clearly one of the 68 best teams in the country, then you run the risk of being left out. I have no sympathy for #69.

SCRUB #1 – Every NFL Quarterback not named Rodgers, Brees, Brady, Manning (Eli), Roethlisberger, Rivers, Stafford, or Newton: I have bad news for you. Your team doesn’t like you very much. Whether they will admit it or not, your team has reached out to Peyton Manning’s representatives to check his interest in replacing you. Fortunately for the makers of Kleenex, Peyton can only take one of your jobs, so there will be a box waiting in all of the survivor’s lockers to cry out their frustrations when training camp starts. The NFL is a cold, cold world. Arguably the best quarterback in NFL history is now available. Never mind the fact that he is 36 years old and has had four neck surgeries. Your team still likes him better than they like you. So suck it up and get over it. Or you could simply go join Terrell Owens in the Indoor Football League.

SCRUB #2ESPN: I miss the non-stop Jeremy Lin coverage. What happened to it?! He still plays in the NBA, right? Is he any less interesting now? Don’t quit on us now, please start back inundating us with Jeremy Lin coverage.


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Sunday, March 4, 2012

ONE TRADE AWAY

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Before I get started with this week’s entry, let’s pay homage to Josh Smith’s posterization of yet another Oklahoma City Thunder big man. Serge Ibaka, smile on the count of three….





At this point there is only one team in the entire NBA that can win the championship. That team is the Miami Heat. They are far and away the best team in the NBA. Although the Chicago Bulls and Oklahoma City Thunder have comparable records, neither has a remote chance of beating Miami in a seven game series. The Bulls and Thunder are both good teams and on the surface they seem to be real competition for the Heat. However, the NBA has LOTS of bad teams (contraction is needed badly, and I’m sure that will be a blog entry at a later date), and it is easy for good teams to rack up wins. This is especially the case when good teams play extremely hard night in and night out as both the Bulls and Thunder do. As talented as the Bulls and Thunder are, fans in both cities may as well prepare themselves of falling just short of winning the title this season, unless….


THEY MAKE THE APPROPRIATE TRADE (or lineup change in the case of Oklahoma City).


There are several teams that are one trade away from being able to push the Miami Heat and possibly beat them in the playoffs. Being the benevolent young man that I am, I am going to save NBA general managers a lot of work by letting them know what move is needed to transform their team from a good team with absolutely no chance to win a championship to a great team that will be able to stand toe-to-toe with anyone in the playoffs, including the Heat.


Before I get to that, there is one thing that I must address concerning my hometown Atlanta Hawks. Starting (I still can’t figure out why) small forward Marvin Williams has reportedly requested a trade from the Hawks. (Marvin has denied this report, but I don’t believe him for one second) This begs the question ‘is Marvin assuming that another NBA team will actually want him?’ He is the worst starting small forward in the entire league. I am not exaggerating; he really is, for proof just read last week’s blog entry. No team will be stupid enough to take on Williams and the two years and roughly $15.7 million he has remaining on his contract after this season. The Hawks did call the University of Kentucky and try to trade him straight up for Michael Kidd-Gilchrist, but Caliparri turned them down with an emphatic HELL NO! So the Hawks are stuck with not only a scrub, but the worst kind of scrub; a disgruntled scrub. My advice to Marvin is to shut up and continue to be the bum that you are, and I will continue to talk about you on my blog for just that reason. Be glad that you are “stuck” in Atlanta and only have to deal with ATLiens like myself calling you a bust and a bum for a little while longer. (If you were to get traded to another market you would be opening yourself up to significantly more ridicule) In two years you will be out of Atlanta and on your way to play in Europe anyway. Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, where was I?... Oh yeah, trades for teams that are actually contenders.


Ray Allen to the Los Angeles Clippers – Although the Celtics pulled of an overtime win against the Knicks on Sunday, thanks largely to the monster game by my favorite NBA player (more on Rondo later), they are no longer real contenders. The Celtics are a prideful bunch that will fight their hearts out and give a valiant effort in the playoffs. That being said, they don’t hand out pride trophies in the NBA. The Celtics are old and staring the need to start over with youth directly in the face. It’s time to move the veterans, and a homecoming in Los Angeles for Ray Allen would be the perfect landing spot for him. The L.A. Clippers are a very good team with a gaping hole at shooting guard. Allen will be able to give them the shooter that will keep teams from double-teaming Blake Griffin in the post and also force them to play Chris Paul honestly. Allen is also battle-tested and knows what it takes to win a championship. He will keep this young team focused and provide a calming influence when the rigors of the NBA playoffs begin to rattle the young Clippers. It will probably take Mo Williams and a draft pick or a combination of Ryan Gomes, Eric Bledsoe, and a draft pick to get him. As long as it doesn’t take Paul, Griffin, DeAndre Jordan , or Caron Butler to get Allen, this is a deal that has to be made.


Pau Gasol to the Chicago Bulls – For some strange reason the Lakers’ are dead set on moving the most skilled big man in the game. We all know that he is soft, but he is also the most skilled post player to hit the NBA since Tim Duncan. For my money, I think the Lakers are idiots for trying to move him, but I’m sure that Derrick Rose and the people in Chicago are hoping that they send him their way. This is an easy trade to make. The Bulls will take on the Lakers highly skilled, but soft post player and send the Bulls their moderately skilled, but physically tough power forward in return. That’s right the Lakers should take back Carlos Boozer in return. Although Boozer is averaging nearly 19 points and 10 rebounds per game this season, he just doesn’t seem to be the right fit to play with Derrick Rose. I think he will be more valuable in Los Angeles where he can provide some toughness inside. Boozer’s and Gasol’s numbers this season are similar, so neither team will lose much production. However, stylistically I think both teams will be better off making this trade.


Rajon Rondo to the Los Angeles Lakers – Since I’m mentioning the Lakers, let me start by saying I HATE KOBE BRYANT! Now that that’s out of the way, let’s talk about the most obvious hole that any team in the entire NBA has. The Lakers simply don’t have a starting caliber point guard on their roster. In addition to not having a point guard on the team, the Lakers are also getting old and need an influx of youth to keep the team relevant for the next couple of years. As much as it pains me to say this, the team I hate the most is the perfect team to acquire my favorite player. Acquiring Rondo will give the Lakers young all-star level talent at the two most important positions on the court, point guard and center. They also have that other guy that I mentioned earlier that is still a top three player in the league. Rondo will lighten the defensive burden that Kobe has to handle on a nightly basis and also allow him to play off the ball more and get easy baskets. I don’t know what the Lakers have to offer the Celtics, except draft picks because they should be moving Gasol to Chicago for Boozer. There were rumors earlier in the season of a Gasol for Rondo swap, but that wouldn’t make sense because that would leave the Lakers with a gaping hole at power forward, unless they can figure out a way to get Luis Scola from Houston. The Lakers don’t have much on their roster that anyone else would want outside of Gasol, and Bynum (no need to mention Bryant here because we all know that he is untouchable). However, I’m sure that won’t stop them, because this is the team that managed to get Pau Gasol from Memphis in exchange for Kwame Brown, Javaris Crittenton, Aaron McKie, the rights to Marc Gasol, and a couple of draft picks. So basically Memphis got a bag of basketballs, 3 pair of NBA logo socks, and Gasol’s little brother (who eventually became a good player). Therefore, I truly feel that if the Lakers want Rondo, they will figure out a way to get him.


James Harden starts in Oklahoma City – As I stated last week, the Thunder are doing their opponents a huge favor by bringing their third best player off the bench. By simply inserting Harden into the starting lineup, the Thunder will have the most complete starting five in the entire league. They will have three scorers that can shoot from outside and blow past defenders. Their inside players (Perkins and Ibaka) and the perfect complement to such strong perimeter players. They are ego-less and love doing the dirty work, defending the basket and rebounding. Having Harden in the lineup will force the opposition to guard all three perimeter players and prevent them from letting one of their better scorers rest on defensive by guarding a player that is not a threat to score.


If the Lakers, Bulls, Clippers, or Thunder want to give Miami any real competition this summer, these moves absolutely have to be made. If they aren’t, the city of Miami may as well go ahead and approve police overtime to cover the parade.


This may sound crazy, but there is a way that my hometown Hawks can suddenly become real contenders. They just have to make the following move….


LeBron James to the Atlanta Hawks – I know this sounds crazy but it would give the Heat some valuable cap space. The Hawks will give up Marvin Williams (who is just oozing with potential) for James, who is clearly on the downside of his career. In addition to Williams, the Hawks will also give up Kirk Hinrich (that way Udonis Haslem won’t be the only Heat player rocking the always fresh Converse) and their next 5 first round draft picks. See that’s an offer that’s too good for the Heat to refuse. I’m sure that LeBron would welcome it also. He gets to play with Joe Johnson, who isn’t quite as good as Dwyane Wade, and Josh Smith, who is almost at the level of Chris Bosh. How can he turn down the opportunity to go to a slightly worse team in a city that doesn’t care about their sports teams unless they have a superstar. There’s the selling point, he IS a superstar. He can make an entire city give a damn about their home team. Who could possibly turn that down?


I know it will never happen, but a guy can dream!




And now for my Baller & Scrub of the Week….


BALLERRajon Rondo: He’s not getting this honor because he is my favorite NBA player or because he played for my favorite college basketball team. He is getting this honor because he (Ice Cube Voice) “messed around and got a triple-double” against the Knicks on Sunday. This wasn’t your run of the mill triple double, this one was special. He torched the “Chosen One” (Jeremy Lin) and the “Washed-up One” (Baron Davis) for 18 points, 20 assists, and 17 rebounds. Yeah, I think that deserves Baller of the Week status.


SCRUBThe NFL: Ok, the New Orleans Saints paid bounties to players for knocking opposing players out of games. That is wrong, we get that. However, let’s not get all crazy and act like this is some reprehensible act that you can’t believe is going on. Football players are wired a little differently from the rest of us. A defensive player’s entire existence (unless he plays corner) is based on the ability to knock someone’s block off. They do it week in and week out in exchange for their regular salaries. The bounty program wasn’t about the money, it was about recognition from teammates. If a player is making several hundred-thousand dollars per game, an extra $1500 isn’t going to make them want to hit any harder. They are always trying to knock players out of the game with every hit. I’m sure that the punishment for the Saints organization will be severe and will probably include a seven-figure fine, a lot of suspensions of players and coaches, as well as the loss of some draft picks. This will be simply to make an example out of the Saints. That is unfortunate because we all know that this happens in locker rooms all over the league. You can’t tell me that the Baltimore Ravens don’t have a standing bounty on Ben Roethlisberger. If you are going to make an example out of the Saints, you must conduct an investigation of the other 31 teams to see just how rampant this practice is and level them with the same punishments that you hit the Saints with.


This is strictly a public relations move. I wish the NFL would realize that you can’t make a gladiator sport safe. Your best bet is to make sure that everyone is well-aware of the dangers of the game at that level upon entering the league, and let the chips fall where they may. Football collisions have the same affect on the body as car accidents. This simply isn’t a safe sport. It’s a gladiator sport played by men with no regard for their physical well-being, or the physical well-being of their opponents. It’s time to stop pretending that it is anything else.




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